25 YEARS MARRIED…THAT’S LOVE

25 YEARS MARRIED….THAT’S LOVE!

This is the 25^th year of my YEARS marriage to Carl, January 7, 2014.  Being at the end of 24 and the beginning of 25 is an awesome place to be. When you embark upon this journey you have no idea what is in store. It’s fabulous, hard, rewarding, hot, cool and so many other things not enough words in our vocabulary could cover. It is the only thing in this life that can give you the best of life’s tough lessons and also its greatest blessings.

 I have to first thank God for bringing us together. Then I have to thank Him for holding it all together, for truly He has done it; and “Won’t he do it!” (Inside joke Jessie!).  Yes He will. I can’t take any credit except to ‘hang on’ and we can both say we have done that and enjoyed the ride, though sometimes those waves were pretty high!  Thank God, neither one of us fell off.

We know God brought us together. It is truly a fairy tale and one we like to tell over and over again. It reminds us that this is not about us because we couldn’t have planned it that way, if we tried. Carl had just moved to Pittsburgh, where I lived, from Texas.  He first saw me at my friend’s birthday party. I didn’t see him. It was pretty crowded and when I went to leave, he followed me out, but by the time he got to the door, I was gone.  He always jokes he looked for the glass slipper, I had disappeared so fast.  He asked the friend he was with how he could find me (I knew this friend) but he never did give Carl any help. He told him I was a ‘square’, didn’t like to hang out.  Carl said he looked for me from that time on.

A few weeks later I was parked at a red light and I saw Carl go into a drug store. He crossed the street in front of me and I thought, “How cute!” He didn’t see me.  I always have to preface by saying I have never done this before but I thought I’d go in and buy something (or pretend to buy something) just to check him out again. I parked my car and went in. I figured he must be a drug rep because he was in the back, talking to the pharmacist. (He was)  He finally came by me to leave and I continued to ‘pretend shop’. I saw from the corner of my eye, he stopped and looked at me, and then left.  I said to myself, “Oh well…yes, cute.”  It was raining, so I bought an umbrella and as I was paying for it at the counter, who should appear beside me but Carl asking, “Don’t I know you from somewhere?” His friend, the owner of the drug store behind the counter said, “Is that your best line? Can’t you do better than that?” We both laugh so hard about that now, as we did then.  He inquired about my name, which was Williams then, as it still is now.  Being a Williams also, he said to himself, “All she has to do is change her address.”  We were together from that point on. We married three months later.  I won’t even go into how fabulous the wedding was and how awesome our families came together and still love each other.  

That’s not all to the story. Switch back several years before I met Carl. I found out a preacher that I knew and helped weekly, him and his wife were friends with Carl’s Pastor from Texas.  Carl’s Pastor visited this preacher in Pittsburgh for his 85^th birthday party and I met him and told him about my hope to find the right man. I even wrote him after he left and went back to Texas and we became friends. He said he would pray for me. Fast forward after meeting Carl and imagine the shock when Carl found out I knew his Pastor. You can only imagine the even greater shock on his Pastor’s face when Carl and I turned up in his church on my visit to meet Carl’s family in Texas.  He didn’t know we knew each other. We didn’t warn him, we just showed up at church and sat up front. He was preaching and he saw Carl and smiled.  He continued to preach and then saw me and smiled a bigger smile. Then he looked at both of us with shock and awe and could hardly contain himself.  He was about 400 pounds and so the crushing group hug after his sermon that day was almost life threatening. J He was amazed that God had brought us together.

There’s more, like Carl Jr. being born on Carl’s birthday, three minutes after midnight (11 days late).  And our prayers for a girl before Jessie was born, saving her a seat at our dinner table and wondering what it would be like to have a table set for four. God answered our prayer.  And there’s lots more but I think you get the picture.  We believe God brought us ALL together. It was His plan all along and when we start to doubt, we remember. Even when it gets really hard and rough and those high winds come and the waves are riding higher and higher and you think there is no way you can make it…we remember, and hold on.  It’s His plan after all.  I can’t say I am surer about anything (aside from my salvation) that proves God’s perfect will being performed in my life than my marriage to Carl.  I always say…YES, we got that right; and our beautiful children are proof of that, also.

I have received so much from Carl. He doesn’t even know the half of it.  Gosh, he has taught me to be a better cook, housekeeper, organizer, business woman, mother and wife.  He has been a sound spiritual teacher, and prayer partner.  He is a great father who is loving and giving and absolutely always present. He is a strict disciplinarian but there is no denying the love. He has always given his time, his expertise, his money, his very hard labor both on his job and at home. Yes indeed, he cooks, he cleans, he fixes things, he sings, he plays guitar, and he spoils us all.  No, this is not an infomercial but it is all true. We are a great team. I have to say how grateful I am for all that is good; and when you get right down to it, it’s all good.  Thank you, Carl. I can’t wait to see what the next 25 years will bring.

The Bible talks about going back to your first love (Revelation 2:4). I know it is speaking of the love of Christ but we can also go back to our first love for one another in marriage; and we should go back again and again. It’s hard when all the intense feelings that draw you together, are no longer consistently there. We think we still need those feelings to prove our love. We don’t.  We grow up and recognize why we really came together in the first place; not for feelings, but for love. The feelings may go up and down and even seem to disappear sometimes; but the love remains, steadfast, immovable.  I want to say to all those considering giving up or who already have, give love a chance and see if it won’t do you proud!  Love never fails!  As Clint Black sings….Love is something that you do!  Stick your neck out. Make it work. Humble yourself.  And remember your vows…

I, take you to be my (wife/husband) to have and behold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until death do we part.

That’s LOVE!